Lessons From the Bookshelf

We just finished building a new bookshelf for our living room.  We've outgrown our Kindergarten bookshelf.  And, we've pretty much outgrown our first grade bookshelf, but it'll have to do.  ...You know how it is!  We just love books, learning games, math manipulatives and videos.  And, I like the fact that NoNut can easily access these things and play with them now rather than have them hidden in bins and forgotten about until next summer! 

As I put NoNut to bed and listened to his bedtime prayers, I heard him say, "Thank you, God, for such a fun time with mommy tonight!  We had fun building my school shelf!"  He was my little helper and was so excited to build the new bookshelf. 

However, it wasn't all a picture of roses.  And the fact that he had such a great time and thanked God for it after my desire for perfection and impatience won out is such a sad testament to what his life is like, and he doesn't even know any different.  About five minutes into building the shelves, my desire to control the situation and get it right the first time without messing up the shelves took over.  Sure, NoNut helped some, but every time he asked if he could do something and took awhile doing it, I would come up with excuses as to why he needed to stop and I needed to take over.  NoNut finally went off to play with Legos, leaving the building and arranging to me. 

Sadly, this par for the course.  How many times has NoNut wanted to help with something and I took over for him because he wasn't doing it quick enough or my way?  How many times does he get so excited over something only for me to crush his spirit with constant instruction and critique as to make sure something gets done right?  How many times does he want a simple "yes" but instead he gets a "no" followed by long explanations as to why not and it usually boils down to inconvenience? 

To hear NoNut's prayer tonight was a stab at my heart.  Such innocence and desire for fun!  He has this uncanny ability to find fun in everything even in the midst of continual nagging and correcting over trivial things.

This week has been really eye opening for me as I see how many times I speak for my child, prod him to be perfect and use perfect manners, do for my child because it's quicker to do it for him and then rob him of trying things because I'm too pressed for perfection or time.

Ephesians 6:4 keeps coming to mind this week as God is seriously pruning away at my life.  It's painful as no stone is being left unturned.  How much I need God to infiltrate my heart and my parenting before my child turns a deaf ear! 

"Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master."  (MSG)

"And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord."  (NKJV)

The Matthew Henry commentary says the following (emphasis mine):

 "Though God has given you power, you must not abuse that power, remembering that your children are, in a particular manner, pieces of yourselves, and therefore ought to be governed with great tenderness and love. Be not impatient with them, use no unreasonable severities and lay no rigid injunctions upon them. When you caution them, when you counsel them, when you reprove them, do it in such a manner as not to provoke them to wrath. In all such cases deal prudently and wisely with them, endeavouring to convince their judgments and to work upon their reason.”

“Bring them up well, in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, in the discipline of proper and of compassionate correction, and in the knowledge of that duty which God requires of them and by which they may become better acquainted with him. Give them a good education.” It is the great duty of parents to be careful in the education of their children: “Not only bring them up, as the brutes do, taking care to provide for them; but bring them up in nurture and admonition, in such a manner as is suitable to their reasonable natures. Nay, not only bring them up as men, in nurture and admonition, but as Christians, in the admonition of the Lord. Let them have a religious education. Instruct them to fear sinning; and inform them of, and excite them to, the whole of their duty towards God.”

As I read that, I have to stop and wonder what education I am giving my child through high expectations and the implied messages that comes from taking over for him because he's not doing something "right".  What alternative messages would be sent if I took the time to slow down and let him explore and slowly guide him through projects or experiences...walk next to him instead of five steps ahead of him urging him to "hurry up"?  How do my current actions and responses excite him toward God?  And if children are "in a particular manner, pieces of yourselves", what does it reveal about me and my heart when I treat my child in impatient, nagging ways?  The answer to that gives a more accurate picture of myself than I care to see...ouch!! 

As hard as it is at times, I'm thankful for the correction and instruction in God's Word.  What makes it even more powerful is to consider just how many times God has "[taken me] by the hand and [led me] in the way of the Master."  What would my son's life be like if I were to truly learn from tonight and live out Ephesians 6:4 and "Take [him] by the hand and lead [him] in the way of the Master?"

Let the Wiggles Out

After a stretch of handwriting, NoNut will ask if he can get up and do some jumping jacks.  I was floored the first time he asked me if he could exercise in between school subjects.  Seriously, a child asking to exercise?!?!  So, NoNut will do ten jumping jacks.  When I see how much fun he's having, I usually add to it and make game out of it.  He will twirl a few times and then end with somersaults across the living room back to his desk.  NoNut will then sit down without any complaining and finish his handwriting or move on to math, another "desk subject".

There is just something about that those brief minutes of physical activity that help get the wiggles out and activate the brain for more learning.  Moments like that remind me of the benefits of homeschooling and letting your child be a child--wiggles and all. 

Last year, I saw the Thumball at a local school supply store but couldn't justify the price.  However, this weekend, it was on sale big time and we purchased the "Move Your Body" Thumball to incorporate into our Language Arts and Math. I couldn't wait to surprise NoNut with it today! 

He was soooo excited when I explained the Thumball and let him play with it.  Thumball was perfect for those much-needed energy breaks between Explode the Code, Handwriting Without Tears and his copywork (it's a lot of writing for one sitting and we're still playing around to find our groove).  And, I even had fun joining in with NoNut because he wasn't sure how to act out some of the exercises.  It didn't take long for him to catch on and come up with his own ideas. 

While the Thumball is great, you can make something similar with balls you have around your house.  Use a Sharpie and write out little exercises for your child to do.  Tie it in with math and write addition or subtraction problems for your child to solve.  Make an A, B, C ball and have your child tell you the letter that his thumb landed on.  You can even do the same thing by writing exercises on slips of paper and having your child pull several of them out of a jar or envelope. 

However, there is just something special about a boy and a ball!  Make it a Thumball and laughter and creativity are sure to abound!

(You can find Thumball at teacher supply stores, Amazon or at http://thumball.com/)

Our First Day of First Grade

First grade!!  Can't believe it!  I've had a touch of nostalgia lately as I think about how quickly my baby is growing up!  It is such a blessing and joy to be able to homeschool him again this year! 

We postponed our first day of school last week because of sickness and prayed that we could start this week.  Though I'm still not up to par, I've been ready for our first day and thought we'd give it a try by relying on God's strength!  I wasn't sure what to expect because NoNut was NOT looking forward to school and wanted to keep having summer break.  He loved homeschooling last year so I wasn't sure why the big change of attitude.  However, it didn't take long before he was full of smiles and saying, "Wow!  This is fun!  This is like last year!"

Our first day was three hours long...much longer than our typical 45-60 minute school day.  But we also added in a couple extra things and adopted a much slower pace.  The other difference is that I wanted to let go and be flexible enough to go at his pace rather than rush through our agenda to get everything done and move on with our day.  I also wanted to work on saying "yes" more than "no" and not being so "serious" about everything all the time.  It was a definite change of pace, but a very special and rewarding day for both of us!

We started the day with "first day pictures" and then moved on to handwriting.  Last year, I didn't realize that handwriting was a process and in my impatience, lost it with my son those first weeks more often than not because he just wasn't getting it.  We ended up in tears several times--him because he couldn't get it and me because I didn't like my attitude and the words that came from my mouth.  It didn't take long before copywork equaled frustration in his mind and he gave up before he even got started.  His defeated spirit revealed a lot about my spirit and changes were made both in my attitude and expectations.  However, this year was a totally different story!  I removed my hands from it and gave NoNut his book and ownership of his book.  He was soooo excited when he opened his book and realized that he already knew how to write the letters!  It was such a boost to his confidence!  We did the first couple pages in Handwriting Without Tears, the "at" pages in Explode the Code Book 1 and followed it up with Sonlight Language Arts 1 Copywork.  It was a lot of writing for him, so I may alternate HWT and ETC. 

We then moved into reading where NoNut surprised himself with each word he read! He enjoyed Lesson 1 of Sonlight's I Can Read reader and even laughed pretty hard at what he was reading (second picture).

After reading, we did Lesson 1 of Horizon Math where he was greeted with a dot-to-dot!  The dot-to-dot was a picture of a boy going to school, but NoNut wouldn't hear of it!  He colored the boy's books blue like his Bible story book from last year and colored the school the same color as our church since "the boy was going to church, not school"!  I got to thinking about how NoNut has no concept of what it's like to walk into a school building every morning (not a bad thing) and why he thought it was crazy someone would walk to school instead of church.

We then ventured into history (Sonlight Core B) where we had a special time talking about the 10/40 Window and THUMB.  We discussed the tribals and how they are animists and that prompted an insightful discussion.  It always amazes me how perceptive NoNut can be, even at age 6!  In the picture below, he's showing off the cross he made a month ago--he wanted to hold it when he prayed for the tribals. After THUMB, we dove into Usborne's Peoples of the World and talked about the differing characteristics of countries and began our own "country collection."

NoNut was all excited about science and doing science experiments.  It became evident that this day wasn't going to pass without a science experiment (we reserve one day a week just for experiments).  So after we began our study in zoology, we went to the kitchen to do some pop bottle science experiments.  My parents had dropped off a pop bottle science kit with tons of experiments to do last week...it was such a God-send on those sick days!  There was a lot of excited laughter and shrieking as the experiments proved to be successful! I love how the second picture captures a little bit of that science excitement!

We then did Bible.  Last year, we started off with Bible and I intended to do the same, but since NoNut wanted to do handwriting and reading first, I took advantage of it.  This year's Bible is different.  We are supplementing Sonlight's Bible with Positive Action.

Though Positive Action has a detailed teacher's guide that's more geared toward a classroom setting, I wasn't really sure how it would translate into our home setting.  It's not divided up by day but rather by week.  I penciled in each day but with the natural conversations we were having as we worked through Genesis 1:1-5, we ended up covering half the week and doing a couple extra activities.  Last year, we didn't do a lot of crafts or drawing, etc. so it was a novel concept to NoNut when I told him we were going to make a creation poster.  The whole idea of making a poster was lost on him so we are starting from scratch (lol, it's a learning experience)!

 

We were using Sonlight's Bible plan for family devos but NoNut loves Leading Little Ones to God so much that we might forgo the Instructor's Guide (which only does two lessons from Leading each week) and just do our own thing.  I really like Leading Little Ones to God because it's basic theology.  It also introduces a hymn with each lesson.  It's well-rounded, deep for a child's devotional, and asks follow up questions to gauge your child's understanding.  I had no clue how many of these questions my son was wondering about God until we read the first few chapters of Leading last week.

We did decide to keep Sonlight's Bible memory program (over Positive Action's) because we love the "Sing the Word" CD.  We try to make scripture memory lively to make Bible memory fun!  I still remember hand motions, tiny songs and voice inflections that my own mother did with me when I was a child...so it works (no matter how corny the hand motions or moves may be)! 

Then, we concluded our day with art.  We are rotating between a scissors skills book I picked up at a local bookstore and Barry Stebbing's I Can Do All Things (How Great Thou Art) program.  I broke down and bought the corresponding DVD to teach us how to do art and it took a load off my shoulders!

It was a great day filled with learning and fun...a great start to our new school year!  

"Parenting From the Heart" Review

Parenting From the Heart by Marilyn Boyer encourages, reassures and instructs mothers at each stage of life in a friendly, Titus 2 kind of way.  Throughout the book, I felt as if Mrs. Boyer was giving me a glimpse into her personal life as she shares what is most important to her as a wife and mom of 14 children.  She gently challenges our culture, even our Christian culture, and presents another way of viewing and living life based on solid conviction from the Bible alone.  It was encouragement for me to put back up my guard and stand firm on the things I know to be true and fight for our home and family rather than cave into the pressures of culture, tradition and man's opinion. 

Mrs. Boyer offers wisdom on a variety of topics from free time, character and chores to potty training, discipline and homeschooling.  She also follows up each topic with real-life stories and helpful ideas, tips or resources.  Her practical and relevant wisdom applies to any mother of any family size.  I only wish I had read this book sooner!

Kindle Edition:  http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-from-the-Heart-ebook/dp/B00D3VPBMA/ref=sr_1_5?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1373836123&sr=1-5
 
Paperback:  http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-From-Heart-Marilyn-Boyer/dp/0970877072/ref=pd_rhf_cr_p_t_2_87VS

Although I submitted the above as my "official review", I have more I'd like to add.  The Boyers run Character Concepts, a curriculum and family company centered around helping parents build strong, godly character in their children. 

I discovered Character Concepts via a google search and then had others recommend them.  I was even more excited to "buy local" as they are 20 minutes away from here!  We purchased Character Trails as a way to weave character training into our daily lives.  And, it's crazy how God is taking 12 colorful flashcards, simple yet meaty definitions to character traits and Bible verses and providing discipline and structure to our home.  The curriculum is an outline and God is filling in the rest as we seek to become more like Him!

On top of the character training, the Boyers have a strong sense of patriotism and seek to educate others on how our country was founded and the rights we need to fight for in order to remain a Christian nation.  Patriotism is something that is so lost in today's culture.  It's something that we don't talk about in our churches nor is it something we really see modeled in anyone younger than age 70 (aka those who haven't grown up in war times).

Between the things I heard at the HEAV Convention, the things I've been reading from the Boyers and then learning alongside my child about how our country was founded, I'm beginning to sense this great responsibility and even duty to understand our past so we can shape our future.  We need godly politicians and godly men and women to take the issues of today and speak God's truth to them.  We are being duped by so many even in the religious realm by the feel-good Christianity that we've lost our own voices and our own desires to stand up for what is right.  We think we are just one person, one voice, and fail to realize the impact that one voice can have.  But I want to teach my child otherwise.  I want to teach him that he has a God-given voice to use for real change and together, as a family, encourage others to find and use their voices, too.  But in order to do that, we have to know what we're talking about and what is most important!

Thankfully, God placed Character Concepts in our path to teach us our facts and our history.  We are being exposed to modern day patriots (whose foundation usually consists of solid character training) and discovering a network of Believers who seek to bring God's light and freedom to our world and to our country by taking a public stand for what is right and for the principles our country was founded upon.  I don't know what God has in store for us and what He will be teaching us in the year(s) ahead, but I'm beginning to see why homeschoolers typically have a strong sense of patriotism and I'm grateful for those who will share it with us!

For more on Character Concepts, visit their blog at http://characterconceptsblog.com.

So much for our first day plans...

We were starting our first week of school tomorrow at 9:15 a.m.  However, these colds we developed last week have turned into something more.  Mine went from strep to something else and morphed into bronchitis leaving me winded and drained.  Thankfully, my son's virus has not developed into pneumonia nor did his asthma flare up, but we had another rough night (the 7th in a row) and decided to turn our sickness into fun.  We pulled out the futon in the living room and had a "sickies only" camp out where my sleeping child tried pulling me under his head.  When he finally woke up, he looked at me surprised and confused saying, "Whoa! I thought you were a giant pillow pet!"  I can only imagine what fun he was having in his dreams to discover such a large pillow pet and the crushing disappointment to realize it was only a dream. 

Anyway, while it would be nice to start school tomorrow, I have such peace about letting our plans go!  Never dreamed I'd ever get to a point in my Type A, planner-doer life where I could let something as big as the first day of school go!  But seriously, there is no point to pushing our first day when neither of us feel like getting out of our pj's to smile for our annual first day photo or to make a special breakfast that no one is going to eat!  The thought of trying to jump into spelling words and making my child read (not his favorite) while I barely have the energy to watch a full TV show makes my head hurt.  And I must admit that the extra time to rest sounds like such a luxury! 

Sonlight Core B, Week 1

So, while I've got our dry-erase calendar all filled in with our first week's assignments, our "cheat sheets" laminated (number line, alphabet, graph paper, etc.), the brand-new folders labeled for each subject and freshly sharpened pencils ready to go for the morning, I'm thankful for the common sense, peace and flexibility to let it go another week (or even mid-week...we'll see how we're feeling)! 

Ahhhhh...the beauty of homeschooling! 

First Grade Jitters

We begin our journey into first grade on Monday!  My thoughts are a jumble as I look at our calendar and our curriculum and try to juggle the two.

As I stress over coordinating everything and leaving room for the unknown activities and last minute trips, I am reminded to take a breath--this is homeschooling!!  We don't have a set calendar nor way of doing things.  We can come and go without the confines of a school calendar.  And this year will look even more different than last year.  We've done this before and we can do it again!  We now have two years of homeschooling under our belts--one year of failure (preschool) that we really learned from and one year of success (kindergarten) that showed us that we really can do what God wants us to do so I need to leave it in His hands, not mine!  

I finally have the time (aka last-minute motivation) to sit down with my massively huge Instructor's Guide (have you ever seen a Sonlight Instructor's Guide??) and I'm overwhelmed and wondering how in the world we are going to fit everything in this year.  Then, what about adding in our art and physical education and swapping out Bible curriculum?  And how am I going to get my child to do all of this copywork and language arts when he hates to write?  How is my child going to learn these reading rules when it's like pulling teeth to get him to read (but he loves it when someone reads for him)? 

And then I begin to read the Instructor's Guide for our first History lesson and my worries fade away as God blesses me once again with answering those secret heart desires (Psalm 37:4-5) for cultivating a missional heart within my child.  "...Pray with your children for various peoples around the world.  Most weeks, we read about a specific people group, and several weeks we give an idea to stimulate your prayer times."  The Guide further goes into what missiologists do and the "THUMB" principle to help us remember the top five unreached people groups (Tribals, Hindus, Unreached/unchurched Chinese, Muslim, Buddhists).  The Usborne Peoples of the World book that had me riled up because they depicted life of other cultures in its accurate form (though viewed as complete nudity in my culture and the unclothed instantly became clothed thanks to my black sharpie) becomes a prayer guide as we explore other cultures and use it as a springboard to discover how God's Word is (or isn't) getting there, where His servants are and what we can do to reach everyone for Christ.  Missionary Stories with the Millers by M. A. Martin revisits some of the great missionaries we were introduced to last year in I Heard the Good News Today by C. Lehn.  And George Muller by J. Benge takes us to England where his prayers and faith translated into caring for orphans. 

This is the heartbeat of our family's homeschool as we lay aside some of the traditional textbooks and ways of doing school so we can learn from real men and women throughout history doing whatever God called them to do wherever He placed them.  Our history is rich with big and small people and moments that changed our world, our history and our future (take today, Independence Day, for example).  I want our family to be known as a family that serves God wherever He puts us.  I want my son to grow up as I did with the firm belief in Psalm 32:8, and that God can lead us down some pretty unbelievable paths to reach people we never even knew existed for His glory.  That is something you can't find in the traditional classroom and it leads me back to why we have chosen to homeschool.

So, while I still feel a bit overwhelmed with the technical stuff (reading, writing and arithmetic) and figuring out the best way to tackle it with my child, I find myself purely excited for the first time this summer to start first grade on Monday!

I'm thankful that God keeps bringing me back to the "why" behind homeschool.  Our motivations, reasons and convictions for choosing to homeschool refresh me and keep me committed to the task that God has placed before our family for this upcoming school year!

Challenging Your Thoughts via IndoctriNation (free preview)

This 30-minute movie clip, a portion of the DVD, IndoctriNation, is worth the time to preview as it leaves you with powerful food for thought.

 http://watchindoctrination.com/

I have never been anti-public school (but went to a private school K-12) and was taught at a young age that public schools were "bad". Honestly, I had no idea why they were "bad" and why we were opposed to them (aside from the whole obvious, secular influences found in the schools). I never even thought twice about it until we started our own homeschooling journey and began to see what education is all about and began questioning education as I've always known it to be (even in the private schools).

At the HEAV Convention, I sat in on the workshops by IndoctriNation creator/producer, Colin Gunn, and my beliefs were challenged as he answered some of the tough questions and justifications that we hold about Christians being the salt and light in these schools. I'm still doing my own research as well as searching the Word and asking God to help us form our own family's convictions based on His Truth.

Don't instantly take this movie at face value but rather research what is said (it's eye-opening as you begin to see the truth) and use this movie as a conversation starter or jumping point to figure out what you believe about education and why you homeschool. Either way, let this movie encourage you in your homeschool journey as you are giving your child so much more than can be given in a traditional classroom setting! 

The "Only One Kid" Scream!!!

There are days when I feel like screaming whenever homeschool moms totally invalidate my family's homeschool experience with one dismissive comment, "Well, you just have one child..." (as if I somehow can't possibly understand what it's like to homeschool children because I only homeschool one child). 

Granted, I feel like screaming because I let it get to me.  But there are days when I want the moms of a larger family than mine to know know that I work just as hard as they do to provide a solid education for my child.

I worry that I'm not good enough as a teacher, not doing enough for my child's education or that I'm totally screwing him up by homeschooling...just like you do.  I spend hours preparing for our lessons, get all excited over neat finds (lessons, crafts, games, etc.) that will take learning to the next level for my child, and I enjoy all the special blessings that come from homeschooling...just like you do.  I want to better myself as a wife, mom and teacher, so I will attend classes and Conventions, read homeschooling magazines and follow my favorite homeschool "superstars" on Facebook...just like you do. 

Moms homeschooling multiple kids often think that homeschooling is a cake-walk for me and others blessed with "only one child" because we don't have to juggle different ages, different grades, different courses.  And while that is one burden we don't carry right now, we have our own set of dynamics unique to our family size that we contend with...just like you do. 

We don't have the luxury of siblings to entertain our children...we are "it".  We don't have that built-in social interaction for our child that comes with a large-sized family.  Nor do we have instant competition and enough players to play Duck, Duck Goose, Leap Frog, Red Rover or Dodge Ball (Simon Says gets really old, really fast). 

However, while we don't have that, we do have a lot!  We are able to pick up and go much easier than you, so we have a unique sense of freedom that comes with our education that others may not have.  There are last minute learning opportunities, classes and field trips that we can participate in because we don't have to juggle multiple nap times, music lessons and extracurriculars for each child.  We also pay for one child so when we offer invitations, we usually forget that those with more children have to multiply admission fees and number of Happy Meals by their family size making a day out totally out of the budget while a feasible, fun day for us.  We also can run to the library on a moment's notice especially when the rabbit trail unlocks that hunger for more knowledge.  And, we can just as easily interrupt school to run up to the grocery store to do real-life math problems rather than pull out our hair over another textbook word problem (plus come back with a cart full of groceries and our sanity still in tact).

But seriously, it's not even about you vs. me or your size family vs. my size family.  It's about us being moms who love our children and are leading them and educating them as God puts it on our hearts to do.  It's also about being aware that sometimes, those casual, dismissive, "you only have one child" statements dredge up feelings of longing, heart break, guilt or pain.  Maybe it wasn't our choice that we only have one child to homeschool and not 2, 3, 8 or 10 children to homeschool like other moms have.  Maybe our wishes weren't what God had planned for us yet we know that this one child that we do homeschool is a complete treasure and blessing from Him as much as your children are to you. 

And moms with one child, let's not be ashamed of homeschooling our only children!  We don't need to let others dismiss what we are doing.  Sure, it means being nice and biting our tongue whenever those famous "one child" phrases are uttered.  But, it also means letting go of those phrases and all the negative and inferior feelings that we let come with it.  God has called us to homeschool our only child as much as He has called the mother with multiple children to homeschool her children.  And there is no higher calling than living out those things that God has set us apart for and called us to do! 


Do you see what this means—all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we’d better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!  ~Hebrews 12:1-3 (Message)