Man's or God's? You pick!

"And now I say to you, keep away from these men and let them alone; for if this plan or this work is of men, it will come to nothing; but if it is of God, you cannot overthrow it--lest you even be found to fight against God."  Acts 5:38-39   The Message translation says, "...If this program or this work is merely human, it will fall apart, but if it is of God, there is nothing you can do about it--you better not be found fighting against God."

This verse jumped out at me a few months ago as I was torn between two different paths to take with myMISSION.  Do we wait around for things to happen and wait for others to catch up or do we forge our own path, leaving behind what many (including myself) wanted to see happen and go a little independent of organizational structure?

There was so much confusion, apprehension and inner turmoil over what was supposed to have been the logical direction to take and one that I thought would totally benefit both the organization and myMISSION PIEDMONT.  During this time, God also brought I Corinthians 14:33 to mind:  "For God is not the author of confusion but of peace...."

These two verses were instrumental in getting me to stop and take a breath.  Confusion was becoming my constant state of life that distracted me from what God called me to do.  And honestly, nothing productive came from that time (both personally and in ministry), and it's time we'll never get back. 

These verses forced me to make decisions that were hard to make and even harder to let go of (and I’m still working through that).  These verses also reminded me that myMISSION PIEDMONT is God's work, not mine and not the leadership team’s.  When I am in sync with God and when the leadership team is in sync with God, myMISSION is inevitably in sync with God, too, because our leadership and decisions are rooted in Him, not in ourselves and in our own ideas. 

Being a leader is a scary responsibility.  One careless, thoughtless, selfish decision/word/action can ruin our ministry and influence in an instant (sorry, but it's the hard truth)!  Leadership requires being mindful that a decision isn't just a decision and the impact of it can be far-reaching.  It’s hard to be mindful in the busyness, planning and relationship building that naturally come with a leadership role. 

If you look at Acts 5:38-39 in relation to your ministry, I'm sure you can think of moments when decisions were made from man (aka yourself) vs. made from God.  We can recall moments when we want to cringe because we know the motivation behind some decisions.  Yet, we can also recall many more moments when God flowed through and it was evident to all that He was in His work. 

These two verses challenge us to make sure that wherever God sends us, it is of Him and that it remains in Him.  When things start getting complicated and confusing, it's an indication that we need to stop and see where our focus is (and how close to being “overthrown” we are). 

When it's honestly God's work and when we can remove ourselves from it, God can work around man's roadblocks.  He changes a "no" into "yes" and opens closed doors according to what works best for His plan.  And, the best part is that He usually does it in the most roundabout, amazing and speechless ways that speak so loudly of Him that all the glory goes straight back to Him!  It's comforting and reassuring that this is His work and it will stand as long as He is in it!

Creating a Leadership Team – Part II

During our first leadership team meeting, we covered the expectations of our leadership team.  The eight expectations of the leadership team were to:

• Support (myMISSION PIEDMONT/WMU, each other)
• Assist (carry out events, do whatever necessary to make mMP work)
• Promote (share with church/friends, post flyers, internet, etc.)
• Attend (meetings and events--including set-up/clean-up)
• Plan (contribute, create, prepare, etc.)
• Pray (that's self-explanatory)
• Share (opinions, feedback, prayer requests, etc.)
• Grow (as a leader, as a team and as a Christian)

Looking back, it never crossed my mind that this might be too much to expect from a team.  I saw the potential in these young women and believed so much in what God called us to do that anything less wouldn't get us where God wanted us to go.  However, this might not be the right approach for your group!  Pray about it and God will show you what is and isn't realistic to expect from your team.

For us, high commitment was foundational for those early days and it's something that my team is capable of.  Somewhere along the line, there was a transition from high-commitment simply because it was part of being on the team to high-commitment because they saw God working through them and through myMISSION.  I'm so thankful for our team and that they saw the vision.  It truly was God that put our team together because He allowed them to see what I couldn't express at that time and gave them the gumption to stick with it.  Looking back, that really was a lot to ask of them especially when I didn't even know them (what is it they say? Hindsight is 20/20?).

At the first myMISSION PIEDMONT leadership team meeting, the team filled out a “Leadership Team Profile” which asked for their basic contact info, birthday info, some fun facts about them (gift bag ideas for later use), and then asked them to answer the following questions:

• What is your spiritual gift?  (Leave blank if unsure.) 
• What special skills or talents do you bring with you to myMISSION PIEDMONT? 
• What are your ministry passions and/or favorite ways to share God’s love with others?
• What is something you are interested in learning or developing through this leadership team experience (can be something personal, leadership, church, WMU related, etc.)?
• Are you willing to make a commitment to being on the leadership team, praying for myMISSION PIEDMONT, assisting as you can and doing your best to attend all leadership team meetings and training sessions throughout the year?
• What are the best days/times for you to meet?

Every myMISSION group is going to have its own dynamic.  For some, a leadership team might not be necessary.  For others, a leadership team would be helpful so all the organization and planning doesn’t rest on your shoulders.  For us, it was about involving other young women because I won’t be in my 30s forever and saw the need to bring younger women along so they can keep WMU and myMISSION going long after my 35th birthday.  I wanted to give them a chance to experiment with new things, a chance to learn through practical experience and a chance to see where God can take us whenever we are open to Him.  Besides, it's way more fun doing myMISSION as team than alone!  These are friendships that will last a lifetime!

For more on the myMISSION PIEDMONT leadership team, read “MoreThan a Leadership Team”.

Creating a Leadership Team – Part I

Pulling together the right leadership team is one of the hardest things you will do with your myMISSION group.  As in anything, it requires a lot of prayer, time and patience. 

It also requires following God's promptings even when it might not make sense.  There were moments when I felt God put this team together more for my benefit than theirs.  The underlying dynamics have been instrumental in teaching me how to let go of control (is it preference or procedure and 99.9% of the time, it's preference...this is still a lesson in progress). 

Like any team, our team is made up of individuals who bring their own personalities, talents, skills, insights, opinions, emotions, leadership styles and leadership maturity to the table.  This make us a well-rounded team as we see things from different angles and bring our uniqueness to the table.  Through expressing their opinions and sometimes challenging my ideas, the team has kept me from jumping into things and/or slowing the down the pace in order to wait and see how things play out.  I’m very thankful that they feel comfortable enough to speak up and play an active role in myMISSION PIEDMONT. 

When we first started myMISSION in May 2011, the leadership team looked different than it did two months later in July 2011.  When I first started calling young women in our Association, I had a vision, a bare-bones structure to present to these women and this hope that they would catch the vision and be willing to partner with God and our Association on this journey.  It was important to me to leave the details "bare-bones" as this wasn't "my" group...it was for the young women in our Association and it was vital to give them the opportunity to make it theirs and give them ownership of myMISSION. 

As I called many young women, some were ready to roll up their sleeves and get to work that day, others wanted time to pray over it and others weren't interested in leading but were interested in participating once the group was formed.  There was a 4-6 week gap between these calls and our first leadership team meeting.  So, by the time we had our first leadership team meeting, God pared down the list of names even more.  Some young women didn't return calls/multiple voice mails and emails.  Others couldn't coordinate their calendars and that spoke volumes as far as their availability to be on the team as I knew high-commitment would be vital to getting myMISSION PIEDMONT off the ground. 

My philosophy has always been that if someone sees the value in something and really wants it, they will make the time for it, and myMISSION PIEDMONT was no different.  Sometimes though, it takes trial and error to put together the right team.  Yet, I’ve had to back off of my "philosophy" a little as I realized that clearly communicating your vision is a "must" for any leader.  That vision and passion for what God is doing and wants to do is what initially captures people and draws them in especially when you don't have a personal relationship with them beforehand.

It’s Not All About Connections

One of the most conflicting areas of ministry for me has been the importance of networking.  It’s something that is helpful as you build a list of contacts for info, a sounding board, project partners, prayer, support and basic ministry resources.  And, it’s great for seeing new perspectives and seeing what is going on beyond your world.  There are many benefits to networking but I've come to the conclusion that networking for ministry and networking for business are two different things.

Over the past year, I’ve been introduced to many men and women in all types of church/ministry leadership positions.  It’s intimidating at times as I realize how little I know in light of their expertise and wisdom.  Yet it’s eye-opening as I realize how much it’s still about who you know in church life. 

I’ve always believed that when God has a plan in mind for you, He will make it happen.  He will put the right people in your path, orchestrate the right circumstances and He will guide you where He wants you.  It’s not something you have to stress over and force because God has already done the work for you (I Corinthians 14:33).

Lately, there have been some really awkward and embarrassing situations where I’ve met people because they were recommended to me as a potential resource and/or connection.  Honestly, I don’t know why I’m meeting them except that they were referred to me as good people to meet (and they really are good people to meet).  Yet in these awkward encounters, it feels so forced, it’s not “me” nor is it the first impression I want them to have of me and more importantly of God and of myMISSION.  In the middle of situations like these, I’m left questioning what in the world I’m doing and where is the leader within me as my insecurities take over. 

During a recent introduction and awkward five minute conversation that followed, it hit me that this is not where I need to be.  God has entrusted young women in my care to love and to serve.  It’s about them, not about who I know or need to know or who could help me grow.  God has already taken care of that!  And for the past 14 months, in His time (not mine), God placed key people in my life and opened doors that I didn’t have to force open.

Ministry isn’t about who you know, it’s about WHO you know (God).  And when God does the networking for you, it’s unmistakable by all and you just know that introduction was a God-thing and God-results flow from it.  Don't force it...God will make the connections happen in His time!

Happy Father's Day

Just as Proverbs 31 describes a godly woman, Psalm 112 describes a godly man.  It was a "checklist" I followed when I met "the one".  As we approach our 9th anniversary in a few months, I am thankful for this checklist.  If it weren't for this checklist, I wouldn't have the ministry partner in my husband that I have today. 

Psalm 112:1-8
Praise the Lord!
Blessed is the man who fears the Lord,
Who delights greatly in His commandments.
His descendants will be mighty on earth;
The generation of the upright will be blessed.
Wealth and riches will be in his house,
And his righteousness endures forever.
Unto the upright there arises light in the darkness;
He is gracious, and full of compassion, and righteous.
A good man deals graciously and lends;
He will guide his affairs with discretion.
Surely he will never be shaken;
The righteous will be in everlasting remembrance.
He will not be afraid of evil tidings;
His heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
His heart is established;

Because my husband is like the righteous man described above, I can trust him to follow God's leading, to sense God's direction, to support God's call and to speak God's truth.  And, because of that, he isn't afraid to take over at home so I can go where God leads me.  He isn't afraid to be a dad, to embrace all the father/son bonding time (actually, they enjoy it a little too much when I am gone) and to protect our family from ministry.  He's not afraid to gently let me know when my priorities are shifting nor is he afraid to offer insight on areas he thinks I can be more effective or to advise me of people/situations that need extra caution.  Can't tell you how many times he has been right and how many times listening to him could have spared me headaches or heartaches. 

As we celebrate Father's Day this weekend, I'm thankful for a Psalm 112 man/dad.  His example is one that challenges me often especially as I see how "his heart is established."  As I reflect back over the 9 years of marriage, I can't help but see how God has put us together to learn how to serve one another, how to serve Him and how to serve others as a couple, as a family and as individuals.  There's something powerful, unified and uniquely special when your spouse sees the call of God on your life and his own role in that call and willingly sacrifices his life to follow God with you.

As I talk with mentors, they all talk about putting family first...some days it's easy to do, but most, it is not.  It's a continual struggle for me to keep my priorities in check.  However, as I remember Psalm 112 and the goodness of my husband, my love and appreciation for him deepens.  He reclaims priority as I remember how God designed us to minister together.  Today, God reminded me again of the pure, delightful gift that He has given me in my husband.  Love how He timed this much-needed reminder with Father's Day!  What a role model for me, what a role model for our son!

The Awkward First Post

There is something awkward about the first post and introducing what a blog is about...would rather get to the meat and leave out the fluff!  So, in an attempt to move from the awkward first post, let me give you a brief rundown on this blog. 

"Blessed To Be Me" was the title of my very first blog years ago and it's one that has stuck no matter the life stage.  I'm truly blessed to be me because God has given me so much through my family, my church and through serving Him.  He has made my life full and complete and it's one adventure after another when following Him in ministry!  Can't imagine doing anything else with my life and am thankful for my husband and son who see God's call and support me wherever God sends me. 

Rather than post about random life things as in past blogs, I'd like this blog to be a continuation of the leader blog started at www.mymissionfulfilled.com (about my journey leading myMISSION PIEDMONT) and serve as an outlet to share what God is teaching me about lay leadership. 

Over the past year, God led me to several young women who are in the same place I am.  And, I can't help but see this lack of connection among young leaders as we struggle alone in our own corners of ministry.  Once we begin talking to each other, there is a collective sigh of relief as we discover someone truly understands what compels us to ministry and the "why's" behind what we do and love to do and the challenges and pressures that come with ministry.  It's refreshing to be honest about where we are and to know that we're not alone. 

There are many resources and networks for women in full-time/professional church leadership, but very few for women in lay ministry--those of us who feel a distinct calling in our lives yet we don't exactly fit in with those who have seminary degrees nor those who are in professional (aka paid) ministry nor those who are heavily affiliated with Christian organizations.  So, hopefully this blog will encourage other lay women in ministry as we serve God together. 

I'm not an expert on leadership nor have tons of leadership advice and knowledge to share.  Yet, God has taken my heart for ministry and the past 13 years of lay ministry (single adult, youth, music and women's ministry) combined with growing up in senior adult ministry to shape me into who I am and how I lead today.  Most of what I've learned comes from simple (well, usually not-so-simple) trial and error as I seek to listen and follow God.  I've also learned a lot through the “it can’t be done or we’ve already tried it” adventures of having an apostolic mindset and challenging the norm with the new.   God also placed many strong leaders, both good and not-so-good, throughout my life to observe, learn from and follow (or not follow).  These leaders taught me more through example than a seminar or book ever could. 

Would love for you to continue on this journey with me!