2013 HEAV Convention Wrap Up -- Part 1

2013 HEAV Homeschool Convention (www.heav.org) ... thought-provoking, affirming and fun!  It was what I expected and not what I expected all at the same time!  Several helpful bloggers prepared me well with their tried-and-true tips!  All the pre-planning (circling vendors, making curriculum lists and having a flexible schedule) removed a lot of guesswork from the weekend!  There was so much to take in from "everything-homeschool" to all the God-things which reminded me of why He called our family to homeschool!

By Saturday afternoon, my mind was overflowing with thoughts that I took a break from the workshops to just sit and write (and write and write)!  I'll post some of my thoughts and lessons from the HEAV convention over the next few weeks.

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The biggest thing that I noticed about homeschoolers from this past year of homeschooling was confirmed many times throughout the workshops:  Most homeschoolers are pioneers (think the pentagon lifeshape for fivefold ministry).  They see the plight of the church and what it has become and where it's headed.  But rather than settle for complacency or try to fix a broken structure that doesn't want to be fixed, a lot of homeschoolers break the mold and become the church as a family unit. 

They strip away everything and get back to the basics of discipling their own children first.  They remove the programs (church and educational) and make it about relationship first and education second.  I was speechless as I heard the MP3 as Michael Farris (HSLDA) in "The Homeschooling Father" workshop echo the very things God was saying to me as I struggled over whether or not to homeschool as it developed into a heart issue between family vs. ministry.

The words in my journal in Summer 2012 were this:

How can I expect to disciple these young women when I'm not even discipling my own child?  How can I show others what it means to invest in the next generation when I don't even have time to invest in my child?  What am I telling my child if I spend all my time investing in others when he's standing here crying out for my attention but I'm too busy to give it to him?  What am I showing him about Jesus and what am I showing others about Jesus if I give to everyone but to the One and the ones that matter most to me?  As much as I believe that leadership starts with the leader and works outward to the leadership team and then to the entire group, wouldn't it make sense to model that on the home front, too, not just for ministry/missions?  What good is it if I spend time discipling others but fail to disciple my family and lose my family in the process? 

Michael Farris's words in his workshop echoed that:

"If I'm not discipling my own children first, I don't have any credibility for ministry.  I have no message, I have no ministry."  

Though the homeschool jargon is a bit different than WMU jargon, the underlying message is the same -- it's all about day-to-day missional living which makes the biggest Kingdom impact (see Matthew 25).


When homeschoolers get back to the basics and learn to follow Christ together as a family unit, it can't help but flow outward and impact the church and the world.  These homeschoolers are in our communities serving as they can.  They are making a difference because they aren't bound to a classroom every day and have more freedom to go where God wants them to go.  Missions becomes education and education becomes missions without waiting for the church to get it or to catch up.

It was neat to see how all of these conclusions from our first year of homeschooling were reiterated this weekend.  God tied a lot of the loose ends together and showed me why He asked me to take a break from all outside ministry (WMU and church) rather than make the four-year commitment to being Association WMU Director.  There will be time for that later on, but now is a season of quietness, a season of fighting for balance, a season for discipline as we flesh out our convictions and align our lives accordingly, a season to continue building on the foundation that was started during our first year of homeschool.  

The other thing I noticed is that homeschool leaders are actively and thoughtfully living out their faith as God leads and when God leads without dissecting every little thing or calling meetings to discuss every little detail.  They don't create committees or gather permission from leadership.  They know how to act independently.  These experiences all create courage, conviction and faith because, most of the time, homeschoolers are walking alone against culture and even the church.  It's about living out God's Word in the home and which, in turn, impacts everything around them.  The great part about it is that this isn't just for homeschoolers...it's for anyone who chooses to live by the Word and run their family by the Word.
 
Looking back, the HEAV Convention wasn't about rallying the troops or convincing/guilting people into homeschool.  It was about equipping the troops already in the homeschooling trenches and giving them instruction and encouragement to press on and to keep following God by holding true to the things He's revealed in His Word.  Amazing weekend with lots to process!!  

5 year olds *CAN* get it!!!

Over the past month, I have heard both sides of the argument about whether or not a young child can truly know and accept Christ.  It frustrates me to have these conversations (esp. with family) because no one really knows what is in a heart except for God.  Sure, fruit happens as a result of a relationship with Christ, but we're too busy trying to determine someone's salvation rather than cultivate it!

For me, I wasted enough time trying to determine my 5 1/2 yr old's comprehension level of salvation this fall.  Thankfully, God opened my eyes to my child's salvation through his insistence on talking with our pastor and being baptized a few weeks ago.  Since then, I "said" I wasn't going to hold my son back any longer and go deeper with him whenever he asked questions (rather than give quick, surface answers that assume that he wouldn't understand spiritual concepts).  And, for the most part, we've been doing okay with that but the real test came during church this morning.

We were visiting another church for Upward (basketball) Sunday where the pastor preached on Mark 2:1-12. The sermon was about the man on the mat and about addressing your own mat and learning to give it to Christ to let Him restore you and help you live beyond the boundaries of your mat--let your mess become the Message, etc.  During the invitation, the pastor invited people to come to the altar and take a square piece of towel as a symbol of taking your mat and going home.  Well, our child started insisting on going forward to get a mat.  In my mother-mind, I assumed that he just wanted it for the sake of wanting something.  I told him no and that he could get a square if there were any leftover after church.  He was getting antsy at this point and said, "No, mom, I need to get a mat because I want to trade in my sins and show that God made them no more!  I don't want to live like I lived last night and I want God!"  (Suffice it to say that last night was 5 yr old disobedience and disrespect in the form of a major tantrum that would leave any parent wondering what in the world they were doing wrong!)  In my mind, I'm like, "What?! Is my child serious? This isn't even our church! *panic* What do I do?"  Must admit that even the "What will people think?" question entered my mind, too!

I felt the Spirit saying, "Do you really trust that your child is Mine or not?"  At that point, I knew that God wanted more than just words and intentions.  He wanted the outward sign of surrender and obedience.  Do I really let my child follow God in his own way and as he feels led to (especially because I "said" I wasn't going to hold him back any more) or do I stand here and pretend that I don't really understand what my child is asking and just leave it alone?

One more time, I leaned down and asked my child why he wanted to get a mat.  He said the same thing and was ready to bolt down the aisle.  Whereas the Spirit had to nudge me down that aisle, our child had this sense of boldness and courage that he doesn't usually display in new situations/crowds as he went to get his mat.  When we got back to our seats, he clutched it in his hands, excited about what God has done for him.  I pulled him next to me and explained what the mat meant one more time (as if to say, "You possibly couldn't have understood a whole sermon and the spiritual implications of it, right?).  And in the middle of that quick conversation, it was if God was saying, "Amy, just stop!  Stop!!  He's mine!  Let him be and trust Me!"

Maybe it's me that needs to take this mat of control, judgment and limited faith and give it to Christ so I may "Get up, take [my] mat and go home!" so that my child can be who God designed him to be in order to lead others to Christ.

I wanted to share this with my mom friends who have kids my son's age as a way to encourage you that our children are listening and learning from our lives.  Regardless of what seasoned Christians may say, our kids are NOT too young to know Christ (I can't find an age limit anywhere in the Bible...)!

In some ways, seeing my son grow in Christ is tremendously exciting because he has 13 years (minimum...lol) in this home so we have 13 years to instill in him the values and teachings of Christ!  There are moments when the questions come and I'm like, "This is great and all but what if he turns away or makes harmful choices when he's a teenager?  What if something happens to us and he's on his own and doesn't receive all the godly training that we want for him?"  This temporary worry for my son's future overshadows everything and casts doubts where doubt shouldn't be.  Yet in these moments, God gently reminds me of His promises for today (and for tomorrow)!  I can't do anything about the future right now except to make sure that I'm loving my child, taking advantage of teachable moments and helping him see and experience God in the day-to-day!  As for tomorrow, well, this is where the rubber meets the road as I hear God asking, "Do you really trust that your son is Mine or not?"

Mark 2:1-12 (NIV)

A few days later, when Jesus again entered Capernaum, the people heard that he had come home. 2 They gathered in such large numbers that there was no room left, not even outside the door, and he preached the word to them. 3 Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. 4 Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. 5 When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.” 

6 Now some teachers of the law were sitting there, thinking to themselves, 7 “Why does this fellow talk like that? He’s blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?”

8 Immediately Jesus knew in his spirit that this was what they were thinking in their hearts, and he said to them, “Why are you thinking these things? 9 Which is easier: to say to this paralyzed man, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up, take your mat and walk’? 10 But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.” So he said to the man, 11 “I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home.” 12 He got up, took his mat and walked out in full view of them all. This amazed everyone and they praised God, saying, “We have never seen anything like this!”

Defining My Reality

I had one of those pleading, tearful, little girl, whiney "God, what in the world do You want me to do?" type of prayers last night with regards to where He wants me.  It's a prayer that follows God's previous answer of "it's not the about the answer, but the process."  However, in my mind, the process has gone on long enough and I'm worn out from dealing with the criticism and opposition and wondering how much more I have to endure. 

A few minutes after that prayer, God answered with a response that silenced the questions!  God impressed upon me that until I can even attempt at doing what He outlined for me in Psalm 112:5-9 (The Message), I'm in no position to make a decision about what He wants me to do! 

"The good person is generous and lends lavishly; no shuffling or stumbling around for this one, but a sterling and solid and lasting reputation.  Unfazed by rumor and gossip, heart ready, trusting in God, Spirit firm, unperturbed, ever blessed, relaxed among enemies, they lavish gifts on the poor--a generosity that goes on and on and on.  And honored life!  A beautiful life!"

Unfazed, trusting, unperturbed, relaxed among enemies??????  Yeah, right!!!!!  That's the last thing I am!!  My initial thoughts are that it's totally impossible and I can think of 101 excuses why.  But, it all comes down to basic faith--do I trust God or not?

• Do I trust God to grow me in such a way that I can live a beautiful life that speaks of Him?  
• Can I let go and let God take me to the place where I'm unperturbed (aka unruffled, unworried, undisturbed)?  
• Can I open my arms wide enough to my Father so He can love through me to the point where I can sit relaxed among my enemies, secure in who I am in Christ, so that I may see their soul instead of all the wounds they caused? 
• Can I get to a place where His voice is the only one that matters so that I may be unfazed by what others say (good or bad)?  
• What needs to happen to make my heart ready so that out of it only comes right living and right speech (Prov. 4:23)? 
• And how can I be a better steward of all that God has given me so that I can continue pouring out on others? 

No wonder God answered as He did!  There is some aligning that needs to happen!  And I have no doubts that by the end of this journey, I will know exactly what God wants me to do!  Awesome!

p.s. 

From Ron Edmondson, Pastor and Christian Leadership Guru:

"We can miss the blessings God is providing by focusing on the distractions of a few critics we may never please…regardless of what we do." 

"Everything can be going according to plan. God can be working in your life, but the critic can destroy your perception of reality."